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學(xué)習(xí)啦>學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ)>英語(yǔ)閱讀>英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)>

關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

  笑話(huà)是現(xiàn)代社會(huì)發(fā)展最快的一種口頭文學(xué)體裁,它體現(xiàn)了某一民族行為中最深刻的和潛意識(shí)中的觀(guān)點(diǎn)。本文是關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事,希望對(duì)大家有幫助!

  關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事:A poor poet 一名可憐的詩(shī)人

  Poet: I hope you've received the little volume of poems I sent you. Woman: Oh, yes. It's very nice. I wonder where I've put it? Her son: It's under the leg of the table, Mom, to make it steady.

  詩(shī)人:我希望你已經(jīng)收到我寄給你的那些詩(shī)了 女人:哦,收到了,收到了,很不錯(cuò)。哎,我把它放哪兒去了呢? 女人的兒子:媽媽?zhuān)銥榱俗屪雷恿⒌母€(wěn),把那些詩(shī)稿墊在桌子腿下面了。

  關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事:Pain Transference 疼痛轉(zhuǎn)移

  A married couple went to the hospital together to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the father. He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it.

  The doctor set the knob to 10 percent for starters, explaining that even 10 percent was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before.

  But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine, so he asked the doctor to go ahead and bump it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20 percent pain transfer.

  The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husband's blood pressure and pulse and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this, they decided to try for 50 percent.

  The husband continued to feel quite well. Since it was obviously helping out his wife considerably, he encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She

  and her husband were ecstatic.

  When they got home, the mailman was dead on their porch.

  關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事:你停止打你老婆了嗎?

  This story is told of a browbeating counsel,who habitually endeavored to terrorize his opponent's witnesses.

  One witness rather tended to preface his replies with lengthy explanations.

  “I want‘yes’or‘no,’”thundered counsel.

  “There is no need for you to argue the point!”

  “But there are some questions which cannot be answered by‘yes’or‘no,’”mildly responded the witness.

  “There are not!” snapped the lawyer.

  “Oh,” said the witness,“answer this then:Have you ceased beating your wife?”

  這個(gè)故事講的是一個(gè)咄咄逼人的辯護(hù)律師,他慣于盡量去恐嚇對(duì)方的證人。

  有一個(gè)證人有點(diǎn)傾向于在回答問(wèn)題之前做冗長(zhǎng)的解釋。

  “我要你回答‘是’或者‘不是’,”辯護(hù)律師怒喝道: “你沒(méi)有必要就這個(gè)問(wèn)題進(jìn)行爭(zhēng)論。”

  “可是有些問(wèn)題無(wú)法用‘是’或者‘不是’來(lái)回答。”這位證人溫和地回敬他。

  “不存在這樣的問(wèn)題!”律師厲聲打斷他。

  “噢,”證人說(shuō):“那么請(qǐng)你回答這個(gè)問(wèn)題:你停止打你老婆了嗎?”

  關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事:A Man of Actions 言出必行

  A crowd of student was gathered on the campus of Oxford University.“You can have no doubt,”shouted a young man excitedly,“that if the Dean does not take back what he said to me this morning, I'll leave Oxford this very evening!”

  A buzzing noise followed.“What a man of actions!”one said in admiration.“How should we support him and learn from him!”said another.

  Suddenly, a girl asked,“What did the Dean say to you, Hob?”

  He bent and whispered to her,“Well,er???er???Miss Rose, er???he told me to get clean away from Oxford this very evening!”

  一個(gè)言出必行的人

  一群學(xué)生聚在牛津的校園里,一個(gè)年輕人情緒激動(dòng)地叫道:“毋庸置疑,如果系主任不收回他今早對(duì)我說(shuō)的話(huà),我今晚就離開(kāi)牛津。”

  下面一片喧嘩。“真是個(gè)言出必行的人。”一個(gè)人艷羨地說(shuō)。另一個(gè)說(shuō):“我們要支持他、學(xué)習(xí)他。”

  突然,一個(gè)女孩問(wèn)道:“系主任對(duì)你說(shuō)什么了,霍波?”

  他彎下腰小聲說(shuō):“哦,呃…呃…,羅斯小姐,呃…他說(shuō)要我今晚從牛津滾出去。”

  關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事:邏輯推理

  A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic.

  "Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin

  g for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"

  A girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?"

  小學(xué)四年級(jí)的教師正在給學(xué)生們上一堂邏輯課。她舉了這么一個(gè)例子:“有這樣一種情況,一個(gè)男人在河中心的船上釣魚(yú),突然失去重心掉進(jìn)了水里。于是他開(kāi)始掙扎并喊救命。他的妻子聽(tīng)到了他的喊聲,知道他并不會(huì)游泳,所以她就急忙跑向河岸。誰(shuí)能告訴我這是為什么?” 一個(gè)女生舉手答道,“是不是去取他的存款?”

  
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關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事

笑話(huà)是現(xiàn)代社會(huì)發(fā)展最快的一種口頭文學(xué)體裁,它體現(xiàn)了某一民族行為中最深刻的和潛意識(shí)中的觀(guān)點(diǎn)。本文是關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事,希望對(duì)大家有幫助! 關(guān)于初一英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事:A poor poet 一名可憐的詩(shī)人 Poet: I hope youve received the lit
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